Pity the poor real estate boss who is allergic to mushrooms. At a private dinner a little while ago, having warned his hosts in advance, he was served a succession of courses made up of “indistinguishable, grey mush” while other diners tucked in to a regular meal. The message had been lost in translation, and the restaurant had gone to the trouble of preparing a menu consisting entirely of mushrooms.
Recharge the tech brigade
Checking through e-mails this week, Diary was greeted by a decidedly “distinctive” out of office, or “OOO” – Diary is nothing if not a master of workplace acronyms and jargon – or so we thought. This particular OOO, from the real estate boss at a notable tech firm, described his being away as being on “recharge”. You know, like a phone, or an electric toothbrush, or a drone. Diary doesn’t quite know whether to run that one up the flagpole, or sunset it.
Rural England all at sea
The Campaign to Protect Rural England is often accused of overplaying the negative impact of new development. And perhaps even the most dyed-in-the-wool nimby would see this picture – tweeted out last week by the pressure group – as going a bit far. The image, opposing development on green belt land and showing the capital sprawling all the way to the English Channel, prompted several sharp rejoinders from the twittersphere. Laura__Fox, one of many naysayers, wrote: “Shame on you. Domestic dwellings occupy less than 1% of British land. Horrible, despicable scaremongering, young generation need houses.” Indeed!
Make way for the jubilators
If you are preparing to retire, prepare to be… jubilated? According to a press release this week, residential developer Shape Real Estate reckons you should move to Dorset and become a “jubilator,” a word that has caught Diary’s spellchecker on the hop and should probably be outlawed internationally. What it indicates, if anything, is that once you have retired you are certainly not past your best. Jubilators – retirees in search of a full and happy life – are invited down to a Dorset retreat: “Many jubilators purchased properties in Spain, hoping to take advantage of lower prices and a better climate. However, Brexit has resulted in far fewer UK buyers of Spanish property”. So, budding jubilators, come on down to Crosstrees, a luxury development near Sandbanks in Dorset – a county celebrated for, ahem, the Jurassic Coast. But we’ll have no dinosaur jokes here. Diary is sure that you will be made welcome, even if you’re the shy, retiring type.
It’s a wuff life for a would-be surveyor
Saturday 26 August is National Dog Day, so a perfect excuse for Diary to hand over a slot to a canine friend. It’s a bit like Propertypets, the EG feature in which our readers’ pawed, feathered and furry friends (everyone from Anthony Lorenz’s budgie to Susan Freeman’s pooch) once stepped up to the soapbox.
Today though, dear readers, we present Nick Leslau’s hound Yogi. Be warned, she is quite the controversialist.
Lady Yogi writes: “I have decided to pen a piece for EG on the subject of discrimination against dogs in the surveying profession. I feel very strongly that it is much harder for a dog to get on in the property world and that humans actively discriminate against them, refusing them equal career opportunities and remuneration.
“Granted, holding a pen is a challenge, as is typing and making coffee, but that only makes me and my fellow bitches even more determined to succeed in what has become a human-dominated field.
“You can see from my face that I am very worked up about this, so thank you for giving me a platform where my voice, on behalf of all oppressed canines, can be heard.”
Yogi, you are most welcome.
