Working from home isn’t working, says the minister for government efficiency. Jacob Rees-Mogg, who was given the role despite being better known as the member of parliament for the 18th century, has written to his cabinet colleagues pointing out that, in some departments, just 25% of staff are on site at any given time. The implication being that they are just lazing about at home. Shame on them! The Victorians (about whom JRM has written a book) would have chained them to their desks for 16 hours a day! And that’s how the empire was won! Of course, there could be no lazing about in Westminster, could there?
An a-peeling offer
Banana bread is for life, not just lockdown – there may be less time for home baking now that we’re back in the office more regularly, but those loaves won’t make themselves. The team at 22 Bishopsgate has a solution: bring four old bananas to its food hall, The Market, and for the low cost of £1 they’ll make them into banana bread that you can collect the next day. We just hope that none of the skins are left lying around. We’ve seen enough cartoons to know that’s a health and safety nightmare.
How much for a room?
A lot of property companies talk about “the hotelification of the office” – a focus on amenities and services that will encourage people back into the traditional workplace. Well, CBRE might just have nailed it… only it’s not the agency’s own staff that want to come in. Having reopened its refurbished London HQ at Henrietta House, Diary hears that the company has now had numerous groups of evening revellers wandering into the office’s flashy new reception, mistaking it for a high-end hotel, and asking whether they can have a drink at the bar…
Calling time on ‘landlord’
Time for EG to update its style guide? US property journalist Rebecca Baird-Remba (@thecitywanderer) reports that a certain search engine took a dim view of the use of “landlord” in the first sentence of a lease story on Google Docs. “Property owner” or “proprietor” were suggested as more inclusive alternatives, but Diary reckons it’s time to coin a whole new term going forward. Tweet us your best alternatives @EGPropertyNews.
well pic.twitter.com/sBHXyzGKDk
— Rebecca Baird-Remba (@thecitywanderer) April 18, 2022
Stage fright
It’s seldom good news when real estate features in popular culture. Usually, it’s shorthand for uber-rich villainy (Hollywood) or social inadequacy (landlords in British sitcoms). So, when Diary noted a triple bill of plays currently on and off West End featuring real estate types, our heart was in our mouth. Reader, we were braced for more lazy demonisation. Up at the Finsbury Park theatre is Clybourne Park, a revival of the “razor-sharp satire about prejudice and the politics of race and real estate”. More a comment on society than property, we’d argue. But then, we would. Anyway – phew. Meanwhile, Ralph Fiennes stars as Robert Moses in David Hare’s Straight Line Crazy at the Bridge Theatre. For 40 years, Moses of course dominated New York, creating new parks, bridges and 627 miles of expressway to connect the people to the great outdoors. In doing so he clashed with the saintly Jane Jacobs, but Hare isn’t painting straightforward hero and villain stereotypes: he wants audiences to argue about Moses’ virtues (or otherwise). Ambiguity? We’ll take that. Lastly, at the Old Vic, is The 47th: “It is 2024 and as America goes to the polls, democracy itself is on the brink. Who takes the White House – and at what cost?”. Donald Trump – natch – is at the centre of the action, but it’s his political shortcomings (or otherwise?) being examined. So we’ll consider that a real estate bullet dodged. No heavy blows landed, then. Is this a reversal of the stereotype? A rebalance? Or merely a coincidence? Diary has its suspicions, but for now best to exit quietly, stage left.
Li-mited supply
Doing the right thing isn’t always easy. So it proved when a well-intentioned developer installed solar-powered street lighting in a new scheme in the UK – only to struggle to source the necessary storage batteries, because of the soaring demand from the EV industry for lithium. It seems the drive to net zero is inextricably linked to this precious natural resource, with lithium consumption in batteries rising by more than 100% each year during the 2010s, and the impact of recycling believed unlikely to make itself felt until 2030. Diary’s suggestion of melting down Nirvana CDs for a new source of Lithium was dismissed as a 30-year old reference.
To send feedback, e-mail newsdesk@eg.co.uk or tweet @EGPropertyNews
